Ever think.....

that you would be the person that would turn to things you hated to try and deal with heartbreaking issues? maybe all motivation to live, and be successful shot out the door, because you had so much of yourself invested into someone that held your heart, or something that you had a deep passion and love for doing? lately that is how i feel. I do not understand how my Christian friends, or better yet acquaintances, either A) witnessing to me like I have never heard of God before, as if I am a lost soul needing to know the Lord. Or B) Just flat out don't give a shit to grow with other Christians because their life is way to busy, or they do not take me serious. Both of these maybe not be true at all. But this is how i broke alot of it down. I have not slept in about 31 hours, I am probably just losing my head a bit. Blah Blah Blah. No need to bring presents to my pitty party. hahaha, just venting a little bit.